THE ILLUSION OF PERFECTION 20

The street lights formed streaks of color across the car window as they sped towards home, away from the nightmare of the police station. Unlike normal Lagos taxis, the car smelled of new leather while the mild fragrance of an air freshener clung to the air the way fear still clung to Tayo’s skin.

Tayo sat rigid, his shoulders pressed back against the seat like someone had poured cement down his spine. His hands were clenched in his lap, fingers locked so tightly he could feel his pulse. He didn’t trust his hands. They were still shaking after the shock of the arrest, and the horror of being locked up in the dark cell with the area boys.

His mind drifted to his call earlier that night—the one he never thought he’d make. In that desperate moment, pride had been forgotten as he reached out like a drowning man to the one person he had disappointed, ignored and even walked away from—Nadia. 

If she'd cut the call, he would have accepted her decision. He knew he deserved it. But she'd listened and without hesitation, dragged her late uncle’s brother—a retired police officer who still wielded an authority that shifted the whole station's air—out of his bed that night to the police station.

Tayo took quiet steadying breaths to soothe his frayed nerves and for the first time that night, relief came like a fragile thread of hope.

At that moment, the cab hit a pothole, and Tayo’s heart lurched with it. He turned slightly, just enough to catch the faint reflection of Nadia's eyes in the glass. She was leaning against the window, her expression calm and unreadable in the shifting glow of passing headlights. She hadn’t asked for details nor demanded for explanations. Tayo had to admit to himself that her silence unsettled him more than any interrogation.

He wanted to talk to her, to explain, to say something... anything, but the words tangled in his throat. What was he supposed to say? That the man she once dated was buried under layers of practiced glam and crippling debt? That the perfection he'd built with the hope of hitting it big was all an illusion and now, stripped of it all, he wasn’t sure who remained? That before the chaos, all he'd wanted to do was; charge his phone and send her a message canceling their plans for the night?

Tayo closed his eyes as he tried to swallow the lump in his throat. He knew that the scar of that night's ordeal would never fade especially because the pain of Deji's betrayal burned like hot pepper on fresh wound. Deji was the one person he'd thought would never turn his back on him not when his life hung in the balance. Sadly, he had proven to him, in a brutal way, that people should be seen for who they are, not who you want them to be. 

Tayo was lost in the darkness of his thoughts that he didn’t know when the car slowed and stopped in front of their block. Nadia gently nudged him before paying the fare. He alighted from the car, clutching his designer jacket like a costume he no longer had the energy to pretend in. The driver sped off as they trudged into the building.  

At the door of his apartment, he slid the key in. The lock clicked, but he didn’t push the door open. He knew what awaited him inside: bare walls, two old chairs, and a bed that had become his only place of solace. The thought of Nadia seeing that truth suddenly filled him with shame. He stood there, shoulders tight, the silence between them thick and uncomfortable. 

Nadia tilted her head, her voice soft but steady. “Do you need food?”

Food? Tayo thought confused. He met her steady gaze and it finally dawned on him that the question wasn’t entirely about hunger. It was about acceptance and no judgement.

Tayo forced a smile, shaking his head. “No, I’m fine. I just... I need to be alone right now and Nadia, thank you. For everything.”

She held his gaze for a moment, eyes searching, but she didn’t push for answers. Nodding once, her expression calm, she turned and walked down the corridor. 

Tayo watched her figure fade into the dim light. He waited until the sound of her footsteps got swallowed by the silence of the night before turning to slowly push his door open.

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